November   2019 . I have been journaling to and with the Lord for approximately 43 years.  Last I counted I had 89 journals!* It’s been mostly fun to reread them and remember the past.  From time to time I will just ‘happen’ across something and mention it to my kids or friends as it may or may not pertain to them. It’s not a priority read so I go months sometimes without reading any of it.  This entry was written after I had been reading a past journal.

*If you’re interested in knowing more about this, there’s a section on my blog site called “ABOUT THE JOURNAL”

From the journal. . . .    December 2009

. . .There is so much in these journals.   Lord – I’d kind of like to read all of it but it is so about me.   Does that mean I am more self-centered than I thought I was?

And I believe God said:

What is your motive for reading it?

Curiosity.  Reminders of the past. To see growth and maybe discover truths.  My memory is a bit flakey at times.   I know my journals are from my perspective at that time.  That makes my interpretations clearly subjective.

Stay balanced concerning the time you give to it. You can’t live in your past but you can learn from it. 

You have been monitoring your talk about yourself lately.  Be careful not to talk excessively about your journals to other people.  The ‘Santa Who’ movie spoke to you in one line, “He always talks about himself”.

Yes Lord.  It was the kid complaining about the mom’s boyfriend.  But what do I do?  It seems that talking about myself is better than talking (gossiping) about others.  Unless it is positive or complementary talk.

Listen and be patient.  Talk about me and how I love your people.  Listen and love.  I can change you and I can use you.  I can highlight and I can cover.  The enemy wants you to not talk and pull away.  That’s the enemy.  Relax.  Trust me all the time.        Do you know how many people have been encouraged by the biblical failures?  Peter said and did some impulsive things that needed rebuke.  But he loved and wouldn’t give up.  People see that I used him.  “Upon this rock I will build my church.” * The rock of failure.  When you fail – I succeed.  Where you are weak  – I am strong.  Hang on and never give up.

Matt 16:18    2Cor 12:9-11