August 2020

I have a husband, 5 children, 5 bonus kids and 15 grandchildren. My greatest desire for them is to love the Lord their God with all their heart and all their soul. Another hope is that they be happy.  I know they won’t be happy all the time and God uses the ‘unhappy’ times to build strength and character but, as a mom especially, I want to see smiles.  So, if I don’t, I want to fix that.  (Men don’t have the monopoly on wanting to ‘fix it’. ) Can you relate?

From the journal . . . . February 1994

Son 1 has been so quiet lately.  I need to give him space.  Lord, bless him.  Let him draw close to You.  God, he needs You, not me. My husband needs You, not me.  Daughter 1 needs You, not me. Daughter 2 needs You, not me.  Son 2 needs You, not me.  Son 3 needs You, not me.  But Lord, for the three youngest.  They still need a mom.  Then there’s the Husband. Well, I can’t totally delegate him to You. Can I?

And I Believe God Said:

It’s a shared burden.  I’m the boss.  You’re the assistant.  You try to be responsible for every area of need for, not just your family, but everyone you know.  Take care of your family, but don’t go dry of encouragement and love.  That’s where you are now. 

Relax.  The world will still go on.  I will restore you, but you must learn not to take so much on to yourself.  Let it go.  Don’t stop studying^#1.  Don’t stop cleaning. Don’t stop planning, BUT stop fretting.*  And don’t worry.  Take 15 minutes to close your eyes and rest.*  This isn’t a mandate. Not a ‘have to’.  Just do it when you get overtaxed.  It won’t hurt.  I’m always aware of your life.  You can fail at everything and I will still love you. I will still want you.  And there are others who can love you, even with your failures.  You have trouble believing that, but it’s true.

Psalm 37:1. Mark 6:31

#1 I was in college at this time to get my teaching certificate and I was very busy!