As I was working on this entry, it seemed very familiar.  I double checked to make sure I wasn’t doing the same one again.  No, I wasn’t but it has a similar message from the Lord.  I was reminded of my teaching days; some curriculums were considered a spiral curriculum because concepts would be reviewed, retaught, and added to, to enhance learning.  The concepts of loving, even when we’re not understood, and God using us despite our mistakes, is repeated again and again in our lives. I believe God wants this to go deep.

From the journal  .  .  .  December 2014

. . .Lord, when I see movies like Unbroken *, I get such anxious feelings.  Very uncomfortable.  It’s like when we watch The Passion of the Christ* each year.  Even though it is unpleasant, I feel compelled to watch because I know You suffered for me.  Lord, I know there is no way I could ever pay any price or portion to reciprocate for what You have done.  I can just receive Your grace and mercy.

And I Believe God Said:

You can live your life and listen to Me.   Love your people.  Give of yourself to them. As you look to Me, I will guide you in showing love. * Sometimes they will respond and understand but not always.  I see your heart and motives clearly.  I reveal to you when your motives aren’t pure but that doesn’t mean I can’t bless the actions.*  When you confess, I will bless you and you can share in those blessings.  You loved seeing your children and grand children open their Christmas gifts.  You loved doing it for them, so the ‘sacrifice’ of time and energy seemed well worth it.  The love in your house was sweet to Me.  You loved seeing Jonathan come into the room while Zafir was opening the gift he gave. *¹ It’s Me in you that loves the good.  Rejoice in that!  When you feel the love, so do I. We rejoice together.

*John 5:19 I do only what I see the Father doing.  Whatever the Father does, the Son does also. * Phil 1:15-18 … But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice.

*¹ Our grandchildren drew names for giving their cousins Christmas gifts. Jon had drawn Zafir, his older teen age cousin, and was excited to see if he liked it.  So sweet.

Thank you, Lord.  God, please help me to fully understand my students and see their good intentions.  I don’t want to snuff out their love and certainly not my grandchildren’s love. *

 I’ll never forget when I misunderstood little Brian when he sang at the church program.  I was directing the class and Brian was being conspicuously loud.  Afterwards I was insensitively questioning him about why he was so loud (I was embarrassed).  He was bewildered and said, “You told me to sing out!”  It pierced my heart. He thought I would be proud of him. That was his intention!

* Mark 9:42 “If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—to stumble, it would be better for them if a large millstone were hung around their neck and they were thrown into the sea.

*Unbroken   2014   Taken from the book of the same name by Laura Hillenbrand. A true story about an Olympic champion who was taken as a POW in World War II.

*The Passion of the Christ 2004