God’s timing is not always our timing.  As I reread this entry, my first thought was that I didn’t pursue what I thought He was directing me to do.  With further pondering, I realize that I did pursue it at the time.  I had been journaling all along, as I always do.  It was a very intense time because I had been going through treatment for breast cancer and struggling with anxiety.  I was desperate for God.  As He answered my needs, the idea came to me to write my testimony of how God helped me through that horrible time in my life. Much of the help He gave was through my journaling when He would speak to me, so I had it right there!   At the time of this entry, that’s what I did.   I sent my testimony to a magazine company, but they rejected it; not what they were looking for.  I did share it with my church family through our monthly publication and it seemed to bring encouragement to people.  I didn’t do much beyond that.

From the journal . . . . December 1988

I was wondering about the plans God had for me concerning ministry. I had been to a counselor and wondered if counseling was something God would have me do. 

Lord, is this the direction I should pursue?  I still think You want me to write.  Okay, I got the Christianity Today magazine.  That was good and will send them a request for their article guidelines.  Okay? Okay.      

And I Believe God Said:

You can do it. Trust Me in you. You have doubts about your ability and well you should.  But with My ability, you are limitless in what I can accomplish in you. Test Me in this and you will see that I am the faithful God.  I inspired the whole bible.  It’s a best seller and My instruments were simply men who wanted to do My will.  Some of them not as much as even you do, but I did it in them.  My words do not return void.*  This you know.

Isaiah 55:10-11 NLT
“The rain and snow come down from the heavens
    and stay on the ground to water the earth.
They cause the grain to grow,
    producing seed for the farmer
    and bread for the hungry.

“It is the same with my words
    I send it out, and it always produces fruit.
It will accomplish all I want it to,
    and it will prosper everywhere I send it.”

September 2021: 

  The Bible is His Word and His Holy Spirit in us bears witness to the truth as we read it. When God gives a word to me, I love how it lines up with His word, the Bible.  This assures me that I’m not making it up. The Holy Spirit makes it personal to me. 

I want to encourage you to see how personal God’s word is! I believe the words He speaks to us will also not return void, until it accomplishes what He wants.