I love reading. For enjoyment I often read Christian historical fiction. Gilbert Morris has always been one of my favorite authors, probably because he always puts a romance within the storyline!  However, there are also always spiritual insights to gain and inspiration from the believable characters he creates. This is yet another example of God using something I love to do, to teach me more about how to serve Him better!!  Win win!!

From the journal . . . .August 1991

Lord, yesterday was good. I recommitted to You. 

After reading a historic fiction by Gilbert Morris, I was convicted of a blaséness about You.   Lately, I seem to accept any amount of You.  Lord, I’m hesitant to say, “Increase my hunger for You,” because I’m content right now.  Or I was before reading that book.  Lord, I love You.  I submit to what You want for me.

Lord, there are two things that I want.  I want to pray like Rachel Winslow did in the book:  To ask You what Your will is and then to pray accordingly.  I also want to have the faith to believe when I don’t see miraculous things. Lord, You have reassured me time and time again that You are my teacher.  So again, I commit myself to be under Your teaching.  Teach me to truly pray according to Your will.

And I Believe God Said:

You are able to hear My voice. Sometimes you don’t want to because you are afraid.  You hate to see your own selfishness.  My blood was shed for your sins, including selfishness. I see your selfishness but I don’t hate you.  You try to make yourself right, but in your mind you know I am the one to change you.  I am the one to perfect, purify, and make you holy.

Rom 7:15 For what I am doing, I do not understand; for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate.
Romans 10:27 ²⁷ My sheep hear My voice, and I know them, and they follow Me;
I Thess. 5:23 ²³ Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you entirely; and may your spirit and soul and body be preserved complete, without blame at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

You like routine but I know what you really desire.  You desire godliness.  You think that someday you will be in a situation where everything is in its proper place:  an uncluttered place.  You are also afraid of that place, more afraid than you realize.  Whether you are at ease or uncomfortable, you must look to Me. Be at ease in My presence.  Your job, your responsibility, has never changed.  Look to Me.

Matt 6:33 But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you. NASB 1995

There are certain things I believe God repeats over and over or says in different ways.  Sometimes I feel like He thinks I am attention deficit because He so often repeats to me, “Look at Me!” and, “Don’t be afraid!”  Of course, He’s right!!  Always!!  However, I am in good company because He says it over and over again in the Bible for all to read!