We’ve been at our church for many years and people have come and gone. I’ve really bonded with many of these people, and it hurts when they leave. It’s especially difficult when it’s over church leadership, doctrinal, or relational issues. But God is sovereign, and it isn’t the end of the world when someone leaves. As always, He has a plan!

From the journal . . . . October 1998

Lord, I’m bitter.  I need to do away with it.  My friend, I’ll call Becky, has left our church.  She’s on the other church’s evening worship team and her daughters are committed to going there so she’s leaving.  I suspect our close friend, Beverly, and her kids will leave as well.  Lord, my heart is bitter.  I’m not dealing with this very well but, Lord, I want You to be glorified.  Help me to love and to forgive.   I think their leaving is a people thing, but I would expect they would say it’s a God thing.  Lord, I guess if they aren’t feeling satisfied by the teaching they’re getting, and they don’t think they’re growing, they should leave.  Personally, I don’t know why people aren’t growing with our pastors, and our worship is amazing.

I recognize that I was emotional at the time and some of my words were words for the wind.*  It wasn’t my place to judge them or their motives.  Also, in Becky’s case her teenage daughters’ involvement was great incentive!

*Job 6:26 “Do you intend to reprove my words,
When the words of one in despair belong to the wind?

As I preceded to my Bible reading, I was in Colossians.

Col 2:1-2a  For I want you to know how great a struggle I have on your behalf and for those who are at Laodicea, and for all those who have not personally seen my face, ² that their hearts may be encouraged, having been knit together in love,

Paul struggled for the people.  He wanted their hearts to be encouraged and knit together.  Hearts knit together . . . . but when people leave it pulls at the hearts of those left behind.

Col 2: 2b-3 . . . . having been knit together and attaining to all the wealth that comes from the full assurance of understanding, resulting in a true knowledge of God’s mystery, that is, Christ Himself, ³ in whom are hidden all the treasures of wisdom and knowledge. 

We must grab the wealth that comes from understanding God’s mystery.  Christ in us.  That’s the key.  All treasures of wisdom and knowledge are there.  Christ in us. 

My heart can stay knit with theirs if I keep this concept ever before me. We are knit together in Christ, not the local church body.  Yes Lord, I see that!

And I Believe God Said:

Keep your eyes on Me.  Love Me and love others as I do.  You don’t have a complaint with those who have left.  They didn’t leave you or Me but you are feeling hurt by it.  I can take that hurt and use it for good.  It’s right that you confess your bitterness to me but be cautious about who else you confess it to.

Oh Lord, I need Your wisdom.  Part of me thinks I keep too much inside without expression, but bitterness spoken can breed bitterness.  Lord, I miss and I will continue to miss seeing these people. I guess I could go visit their new church on Saturday nights.  Maybe.

I never did go and visit their church. However, as I think about it today, twenty plus years later, I am still close friends with Becky. In fact, our mutual friend Beverly stayed, and her son married my daughter!  

Many people have come and gone to our church throughout the almost fifty years we have been there. For His own purposes God has always kept us there.

What an amazing gift from an Amazing God!   

I regularly meet with three different groups of women who have gone to my church at some point and I am able to have lunch or at least phone dates with many more whom I dearly love! I did not lose those meaningful relationships because our hearts were knit together in Christ Jesus!  The love He has given us for each other will last through eternity!!